We engage in relationships to enhance our life, of course, you will need to make a significant number of sacrifices to keep a relationship going and to make it work. Many of us will ultimately make these sacrifices just to be with the person we love and want to spend time with. Many others will go insane just think about this.
Sometimes, things don’t work out as we had planned and the relationship ends even though there may still significant feelings between those involved. This quite often happens when one of those involved constantly screws up or exhibits inappropriate behavior towards the other. This does not include leaving the toilet seat up. All too frequently it is the man who is the one who is guilty for ending the relationship, after all, men don’t always think with the proper part of their anatomy. How often have seen a guy figure out too late how much he cares about the other person and wants to change. Unfortunately this usually happens only after he has lost her. Keep in mind, women are guilty of this too, but men seem to be the most frequent offenders.
Fear not, because unless you did something incredibly stupid or cheated on them, quite often this relationship can be salvaged. There is nothing worse than being dumped by the one you love and may have believed was “the one”. Trying to get a woman back in to your life is difficult, but not impossible. It often comes down to how much pain and begging you can handle.
At some point in life, we all lose something that we really wish we held on to – in this case, you lost your love and the need to get your ex back. Getting back together with your lost love is not about “getting” them back or even about repairing the damage. It’s about winning them back. Winning them back implies a few important things, few of them are appealing to most men. But, hey, you got yourself into this!
It implies great effort on your part. Only you will know if they are worth that effort. (If you are not sure, the answer is no.)
The first thing you need to do is see her in person. The odds of this change depending on how big of an ass you were. Call her and tell her that you really want to see her, this may involve a significant amount of begging, but in a dignified yet manly way. If she agrees to meet, make it something easy like a lunch at a place you both are comfortable in. It is important that your ex sees you in a bit of a different light, so dress a bit different and change some things up about you so that your ex actually notices that there is something different, even if she can’t easily put her finger on it. Explain how you have seen things from her point of view and that you understand why she had to walk away. Apologize sincerely. Repeatedly, and show actual remorse for your actions.
If she doesn’t want to talk to you by not picking up the phone when you call her, just surprise her with a card, flowers or something unique. Do not try by waiting in front of her office or where she works, that’s just plain creepy. But before you try any over the top gestures or something in person, make certain that she isn’t dating someone new, that can cause the problems to escalate quickly and ruin your chances of a reconciliation.
It’s important to act like you just started dating, remember to make her feel special. Be honest, and tell her that you still think about her. Use the past to your advantage and let her know that anyone deserves a second chance, that things will be different now.
Do not stalk her! This often ends badly or with a restraining order, don’t give the impression that you are very desperate. Just tell her that you are truly ready to make the relationship a priority in your life.
If you can get her to go on a no obligations date with you, be positive, laugh and smile. Make her feel good. Subtly touch her in a non-sexual way when she’s talking. You must raise the level of attraction between the two of you, if she still cares for you, the attraction may be very evident but if she didn’t fall into your arms after your date don’t give up. Depending on how big of a schmuck you were will determine the size of the walls you need to tear down.
Call or text her, but not too often, and just tell her how you feel. Also you can make something special for her, like sending flowers and buy her thoughtful or sentimental gifts. Don’t forget about an anniversary and birthday. Again, do not be a creepy stalker, there is a major difference between an occasional text or gift and a deranged ex boyfriend.
E-mail her and subtly let her know that you are available any time if she wants to go out with you. Also assure her that you are not a player and doing the same thing with other girls and that she is the most important person.
Be yourself, your new and attentive self, show her that you don’t play games and your intentions and feelings for her are very serious. Also, don’t be jealous if she had a date with another guy, don’t dwell on it, she may go out to see what’s out there, if the time comes when she is ready to see you again she will dismiss anyone she has dated.
With a little luck and some personal charm you can get your girlfriend back faster than you think. Just don’t be creepy, and always try to see things from her point of view.
